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 You’ve looked to the Bible, the Torah, the Koran and the Vedas, all searching for some kind of underlying meaning behind what you see and experience and feel. What you got were stories about shiftless, unemployed men wandering around the middle-eastern desert pretending to be prophets and messiahs a couple of thousand years ago. All of which left you both spiritually and intellectually worse off than you were before.

You’ve tried the self-help section where you learned habits of highly effective folks, and learned how to both win friends and influence people.  You ate some chicken soup for your soul, but you were just hungry again in an hour.

You’ve practiced spiritual mysticism with the Kabbalah, and practiced . . . other forms of mysticism with the Kama Sutra, and they both left you drained.

Finally someone with no qualifications whatsoever has written the book you’ve been looking for all your life. Here, in one almost shockingly succinct tome, lay all the answers for which you’ve been searching. Not just why are we here, but where else have we been, or will we go? All with an eye toward 21st-century science rather than first century delusions. You'll want a spare copy for a friend. Spread the word.

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